Friday, December 31, 2004

Nifty Banner

Okay, shameless plug time.

I made this today and I'm trying to figure out a way to make it fit at the top of the page:

Visit Dave's Blog

I can't do it just yet. But in the meantime, if you think this place is worth advertising, you can copy-and-paste this code into your own page and link to me:

[a href="" target="_blank"][img src="" width="468" height="60" alt="Image Hosted by" /][/a]

Just replace these [] with these <> and you have it!

I'll make more later.

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

When The Lights Go Down in the City...

It's been raining here in Long Beach since Monday. But that's okay - I like it.

Last night, however, we got hit by a weak tornado that ripped out trees like crazy. Many came down near our neighborhood and we also lost power for about 3 hours.

It was strange, though. I was asleep when this all happened but was awakened by Ann poking me and saying, "We lost power." But it's not like we were watching TV or anything. It happened about 12am or so, and I noticed it back on at 3am. Of course, Anthony slept through it all.

We figured something was going on. Our cat Ozzie, who recently decided not to sleep in the bed with us, suddenly decided to join us shortly after this happened. They always seem to know...

Here are some of the fallen trees:

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I also noticed that Heartwell Golf Course was closed because the tornado had ripped off the nets on the driving range, as well as uprooting one of the wooden poles.

The plus side of all this?

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A really cool rainbow.

More rain's a-comin', too.

Thursday, December 23, 2004


I made the mistake of using to host my images for a Fark Photoshop contest. By doing so, I exceeded my alotted bandwidth - so my blog pictures are gone!

They will return when I will switch hosts later today. Kinda busy at work right now.

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Happy Holidays...?

Even before we moved in, we have had problems with our neighbor. I won't get into details, but let's just say we haven't gotten along - ever.

Today they did something that my wife and I have repeatedly requested they not do. We've called downtown, the health department, everybody short of the Governator to help us out. Our calls never get returned, our e-mails ignored.

Our neighbor recently put this sign on his roof. This surprises us, considering how nasty they have been to us. Kind of defies the whole "love thy neighbor" thing.

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Tired of his idiocy, I did this:

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I did it in Photoshop to calm my nerves down. I was pretty much ready to explode after dealing with their crap today.

Here are some alternate versions, also done in Photoshop:

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I feel better.

Sort of.

Friday, December 10, 2004

All Hail Lukket, You Gullible Fools!

Of the millions of web sites that are out there, I can say with pride that I’ve been an active member for 2 over years at one that has been instrumental in fooling a lot of people, as well as melting servers by giving them more traffic than they can handle. is not your ordinary place on the web. It’s humor, politics, and Photoshop contests all rolled into one. Users submit stories from various online sources and, if lucky, they get approved for the main board – sort of a gold star on their user profile. Speaking of which, here’s mine.

The Power of Fark has duped many people, including those bought the story of the Kenny Rogers riot, and those of you who may have gotten this image e-mailed to them recently:

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It may have come with some text about how “this is how scientists in 1954 envisioned the computer of the future! OMG!!! LOL!!! ROTFLMAO!!!!111!” or something like that. But this image was actually created for a Fark Photoshop contest back in September, 2004. While us Farkers knew it was a fake and never meant it to become a hoax, it got into the hands of someone who thought it was real – obviously a non-Farker. Well, that or it was a lurker who thought it would be funny to start something.

So it made the rounds. Maybe you even got it in your inbox. And it eventually made its way to, where it was debunked 19 days after being posted on Fark. Since the debunking, various outlets such as Popular Mechanics,, and a host of other web sites have been examining the image. Even uber-dork Moby posted the image on his web site's main page, and Sun Microsystems CEO Scott McNealy also fell victim to the image.

While technogeeks on message boards and English majors around the world are always quick to point out the technical inaccuracies and grammatical errors of the image, one thing is clear: It fooled one hell of a lot of people.

And while all websites are quick to dismiss it is a hoax, most never mention the creator. All hail Farker Lukket, who was the genius behind the image.

So to the technogeeks who bitched about how inaccurate the image was: The joke’s on you. It was never intended to be accurate, or to become a hoax. It’s a submarine, for God’s sake! It’s got a freakin’ steering wheel! The contest was called "Photoshop this mock-up of a submarine's maneuvering Room", not "Let's start a new urban legend by Photoshopping this submarine room into a computer". If you can’t tell a "1954 computer" from a submarine control panel, you need help. That, and you're pissed because you probably thought it was real or meant to be real at first. Bow the the mind of Lukket, infidels!

To those picking on the grammar: Fark off. English is not Lukket’s native language but it was still good enough for people around the world to believe for it, making it an urban legend in no time flat.

And to those of you who fell for it and forwarded this to as many people you could: Behold, the Power of Fark.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Bonus Entry for December 7, 2004

Yay! Today you get 2 entries!

A few years ago I bought an Archos Jukebox MP3 FM Recorder (no link - it's outdated) to store my downloaded and ripped music. With 20GB of storage, the thing's outstanding. It's been dropped many times and still manages to play. It can also be used as a hard drive, which has come in handy when transferring files.

I recently upgraded to an Archos AV140 and gave my wife the old one. She doesn't have as much music as I do so it suits her fine. The AV140 has 40GB of storage and can record videos as well. Sort of like a mini-TiVo, minus the $4.95 monthly fee.

I'd been thinking about one of these for quite some time now, and I'd considered all manufacturers (iRiver, Creative, etc.) My old Archos gave me such good luck that I thought I'd stay loyal to the brand. I don't regret it. These things, called anything from Portable Media Centers to Personal Video Players, are going to be hot. They have to be if Apple is upgrading their iPods to playback photos.

Speaking of which...

iPod Photo - 40GB, no video playback or recording, stores photos: $499.
Archos AV140 - 40GB, video playback/recording, portable HD, remote control, digital camera capable, FM-radio capable: $299.


Anyway, I've ripped some DVDs to it and have recently been recording The Venture Brothers with it.

I thought I'd try some screencaps with the thing, so here's a sample:

Dr. Orpheus offers Hank and Dean some pizza rolls in "Return to Spider-Skull Island"

This was all I was able to do because my dumb ass forgot the charger for the MP3 player at work, so it only had enough juice to record the show and playback for only a few minutes. I can try some more tomorrow.

I think it looks damn good myself!

From the set of American Dreams

My brother Raul sent me some digital image goodness from his stint on "American Dreams".

With Sarah Ramos, who plays Patty Prior.

With Sean Marquette, who plays Lloyd Cutler.

The location: Loyola High School in Los Angeles, CA.

Production equipment.

WLAI news truck, a 1957 Ford.

The not-so-glamorous dressing room.

All in all, he said he had a great time and the people were incredibly nice. He had some lines, he's a cast member, he can join SAG. Not bad for a guy who once worked at The Wherehouse, eh?

Monday, December 06, 2004

What's With All the Crap? offers some great free junk for websites. And since maintaining a blog is easier than maintaining a website, I've added some of the features here.

Believe me - there's more than that.

Hope you like 'em!

Anthony Visits Santa

Ann wanted to take Anthony to visit Santa today, so here are some captured shots from my DV camera.

I missed out on this - I had to work.

Is it over yet?

Who is this guy?

Now it's time to go home.

There is an actual picture that was taken after all this, but I've decided that these are much more amusing.

Friday, December 03, 2004

My Brother - The Actor?

People fly from all over the world to make it in Hollywood. They work to make ends meet, go to auditions, struggle in general.

But just what does it take to become an actor in Hollywood? For my brother, all it took was a penchant for wearing loud shirts, a healthy appetite, and frequent visits to one particular restaurant.

It turns out that he and some of his co-workers eat at a place called Cafe 50s quite often. They had been going there for some time now and recently, it has become a hangout for actors on the NBC show “American Dreams” - which honestly, I’ve never seen.

When the actors’ lunch break is up, they are rounded up by an assistant and told to head back to the studio. On a few occasions my brother was mistakenly herded up as part of the cattle because of the shirt he was wearing – some sort of loud 60s-style bowling shirt. He had to tell the assistant that he wasn’t part of the cast.

So time goes by he begins to chat with the actors and producers, befriends some of the cast, and gets to go on the set to see where it all takes place.

Then, lo and behold, I get a call from him today. He tells me that they needed someone to play the part of a TV reporter and someone [from the show] suggested that he was a good match for the role. He sent some pictures and – what do you know – he gets the job.

He says shooting begins on Monday, December 6. He has three lines and will get paid union scale. And because he has a speaking role, he earns his SAG card...or so I understand from the screenwriting class I took in college.

While this is his first appearance as an actor, it is not his first TV appearance. His vast knowledge in all things Hollywood got him interviewed for a documentary about the William Desmond Taylor murder, a show that aired on a cable channel (I forget which one) way back in 2000. He’s also done some voiceover work for radio commercials at some of the radio stations where he’s worked. But even that brief cable TV appearance made him recognizable to fellow Blue Line passengers, who asked if he “was that guy on The Biography Channel last night.”

I'm not really sure if that’s a compliment or not. After all, they do air shows about Hitler.

I told him to ask if the show needed extra writers. What have I got to lose? Well, I guess I could watch it now and then.

Check back for updates, pics, screenshots, etc.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

To Spit or Not to Spit...?

I was faced with an interesting dilemma the other morning.

During the course of our morning ritual, aka "packing up the kid", I found I had an incredible urge to spit. I had just eaten a bowl of cereal and the milk was beginning to mix with the saliva and...well, I had to get rid of it.

But I thought of something: When?

I hadn't yet kissed Ann or Anthony. If I spit beforehand, that would seem kind of nasty - hock a big loogie, wipe my mouth, kiss the loved ones goodbye? Nah.

Then I thought of the alternative: Kiss them and then spit. Yeah, that would have gone over really well with the wife I'm sure. Granted, she probably wouldn't have said anything but at least that shows I had some consideration for her.

I opted to wait until nobody was looking and then hurl it into the lawn.

Anthony didn't care either way.

Sunday, November 28, 2004

I'm Back!

What's even more amazing is that I didn't even go anywhere. I just haven't had time to post any ramblings lately!

Well, today is really no exception. So I thought I'd entertain you with a few pictures of my cat, Ozzie, goofing around in an empty case of Pepsi:

Like most cats in this world, he likes to climb into things and stay there for hours on end. This, however, only lasted a few minutes.

Oh, and we spent a good portion of the weekend decorating the house. I'd post some pics and even though it looks incredible, the place still looked really messy. And besides, Christmas lights look so much better without a camera flash illuminating the room.

I'll be back when I've got more stuff to babble about :)

Monday, November 15, 2004

Big Breakfast?

When it comes to breakfast, I usually whip up a bowl of Cocoa Pebbles or make some Pillsbury Toaster Streudels - the Strawberry Cream Cheese ones being my favorite.

But since we now have our Entertainment coupon book, we decided to take advantage of the McDonald's offer of a free Big Breakfast with the purchase of the same.

It'd been years since I had one so I figured what the hell.

I should have taken a picture. You would not have believed it.

Breakfast, partially. As for Big, well, it was far from it.

When I opened the Styrofoam container, I was shocked to find out that McDonald's latest Big Breakfast version, perhaps Big Breakfast Millennium Edition, consisted of a biscuit, some scrambled eggs, and a chewy sausage patty. Oh, you do get a hash brown patty but damn - this was crappy!

Let's put it this way. The biscuit was split and utilized as the bun, and the eggs and sausage were the innards. I combined that with one packet of runny McDonald's jelly and I had my "big" breakfast - on a bun. Basically, when you order one of these things you are getting a Sausage and Egg Biscuit Value Meal sans the drink.

The plus side: We only spent $3.50+ for the two. Even at that, I still think we were charged too much.

McDonald's sucks eggs. And sausage.

Friday, November 12, 2004


I've added a new banner to the blog. Not because told me to, but because I'm anxiously awaiting the release of "The Phantom of the Opera" movie. It's been a long road, even if at one point Antonio Banderas was being considered for the role of The Phantom. Truth be known, he's not all that bad. See either Spy Kids movie - good for a laugh.

What I'm interested to see is how this elaborate stage production will carry over to the big screen. I've seen the show umpteen times and know quite a bit about it. Even have a prop from it.

If you've seen the show, this is one of the "Notes" from The Phantom.

Here's the envelope:

And here's the note:

These came courtesy of Marie Danvers who played Chistine in the last Los Angeles production of the show. She and my brother are good friends, and she's quite down-to-earth. Ann and I got a chance to meet her after a show. It was funny seeing how many people had no idea who she was when she walked out backstage - and they had just seen the show!

At any rate, Marie enlightened us about one of the dangers of working at Arby's - Potato Cakes. She says they're addicting and swears she's eaten more of those than anybody else on the planet.

They are good...

Thursday, November 11, 2004

SLASHED! Update, Part 2

I've now learned that our neighbors, the kids that were being questioned about things, were victims as well. A bike was stolen from their front yard from what I hear.

There are now "stolen bike" posters around the neighborhood which prompted me to ask myself:

1. Why did they even have a picture of the bike to begin with? It's a piece of crap!
2. It's a piece of crap - why would they want it back?

It reminded me of Pee Wee's Big Adventure, one of my favorite movies, co-written by the late and still sorely missed Phil Hartman. Maybe I should call and tell them it's in the basement of The Alamo.

Oh, and I've created an Wish List. I'm still adding stuff to it.

Monday, November 08, 2004

What A Bargain

Ann and I picked up one of those Entertainment 2005 coupon books at Target last week.

At a price of $22.50, the thing has more than paid for itself. It's mostly 2-for-1 coupons for various fast-food joints, but also has coupons for fancy local restaurants.

Highly recommended stuff. Get one!

Sunday, November 07, 2004

My New Toy

I picked up this Tyco RC car at Ralphs yesterday for $20. The digital camcorder is attached to it with a mini clamp/tripod. I need to adjust the weight distribution because the thing flips when going from reverse to forward.

I have two cats. You can only imagine the trouble I'm gonna cause them now.

Saturday, November 06, 2004


So it turns out that there were about 20 other cars that were victimized by a roving band of drunken idiots that night.

This is what Ann learned at the local tire store, where they couldn't keep enough tires in stock. In fact, we had to order the tire for Ann's car. She was talking to another victim who had his son's tires slashed and swore that "the cops better find these guys before I do." My thought exactly.

From what the guy said, he heard and saw a group of "kids" drinking on the corner earlier that night. He also found the bed of his son's truck filled with beer cans the next morning.

One day and $130 later, we have a new tire. Many thanks to the assholes who found great pleasure in taking food out of my son's mouth for this unexpected expense. I hope you are caught and forced to pay the victims what they spent for new tires. Speaking of which...

The police were here tonight and, from what I can speculate, were questioning one of the 20-something kids next door to me. For someone who wasn't a victim of the slashing, he sure was agitated by the whole thing.

Strange, isn't it?

Friday, November 05, 2004


It was a beautiful morning. The sun shone through the leaves of the sweetgum tree. The dew-covered grass of my front yard was also decorated with fancy autumn colors. A classic Southern California winter morning to this point.

I snuggly packed up Anthony and Ann's car, gave them both a kiss, and off they went. I soon departed for work as well.

About a minute into my journey to work, I get a call from Ann on my cell phone.

"I think I have a flat," she said. I asked where she was and I met her there. From there we went back home.

But on our way home I noticed something. Many cars had flat tires on the street to the east of us. One car had both tires on the driver's side flattened. All cars with flats were parked in the street. I counted five cars altogether.

Apparently, we were number six:

Ann hadn't seen the other cars so when we got home, I told her I was going to call the police.

Twenty minutes later, the police came and took a report. From what they told us, there was a city-wide tire slashing spree last night in Long Beach. Ann thought something was up because she told me she heard a noise about 8:30 last night, but didn't notice anything unusual outside. With the people behind us remodeling their house, we've become used to loud and random noises lately, so that probably why I may have dismissed anything I might have heard.

The one time Ann decides to park in the street, this happens. Not a lot we can do about this except buy a new tire.

And park in the driveway from now on.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Deja Vu

Just the other day, I plopped Anthony on my shoulders for the first time. He enjoyed it. I told Ann to take a picture of us.

Soon afterwards, I was reminded of a photo that my mom took of me and my dad with me resting on his shoulders.

Here are both pics, side-by-side:

My father died when I was 7 years old. I've made a promise to Anthony that I'll be around a lot longer than that.

Monday, November 01, 2004

Poorly Drawn Together

Being a writer, I hate reality shows. But I was a fan of the first season of MTV's The Real World back in the 90s. It was something new back then, before the airwaves were saturated with them.

That said, I watched a show last night on Comedy Central called Drawn Together. It is billed as the "first animated reality show" and from what I saw on the website, seemed interesting.

But that's about all that was interesting.

The show is based on animated characters from different genres: A 20s Betty-Boop-style character, a Pokemon-ish animal, the goody-goody Disney-esque princess, etc. Like The Real World, they are selected to live together and we are subjected to seeing what happens.

So what happened?

The animated Internet pig (voiced by Adam Carolla) routinely micturated on anything or anyone it pleased, and the princess and the girl who looked like a Josie and the Pussycats reject exchanged a long, passionate kiss in the hot tub. Aside from that, the other conflicts, if they were even so, weren't exactly amusing.

What makes this show unbearably painful to watch is that it has no likeable characters. Each is as annoying as the next and I wanted to strangle every one of them after the first 5 minutes. I understand what the creators are trying to accomplish or what their concept was meant to be like, but it just didn't work for me. I'd rather watch Family Guy and if you know me, that's really saying something.

If you want to watch a funny animated show, give Cartoon Network's Adult Swim show The Venture Bros. a try.

Any show that makes references to Depeche Mode is alright by me.

Saturday, October 30, 2004

Happy Fruits is Very Delicious!

Yeah, that's just what I thought when I saw that. It was printed on a cup I purchased today at a really bitchin' place called Marukai 98 Cent Superstore in Fountain Valley, CA (sorry, no interweb links available).

Formerly home of a Planet Kids children's activity center, this store delivers a plethora of Asian items. Did someone say Mr. Sparkle? After shopping around for awhile I actually felt as if I were in some sort of Japanese K-Mart or something. Loads of useful crap all at bargain prices!

Part of the beauty of the store lies in the packaging of the items. What isn't in Japanese is in pure Engrish, a term used for when a Japanese person attempts to write English but with humorous, yet bizarre, results.

Case in point - My Puti Fresh cup:

What it means, I don't know. What it's supposed to mean...ditto. I just thought it was funny as hell.

The store is located on Magnolia Ave. in Fountain Valley. Definitely worth the trip no matter where in SoCal you are. It's just behind J&J Subs, home of the best teriyaki beef sandwich I've ever had.

Here's something else for you. At our favorite Chinese restaurant in Signal Hill, CA they were having trouble with people stealing the paper lanterns which were hanging outside the restaurant. With only one left, they posted this sign in the window:

Evidently, putting the fear of Confucius in people works: The one lantern remains; the other two were replaced with gigantic fold-out pineapples.

Confucius says, "Steal my lantern, I kick your ass!"

Thursday, September 16, 2004

The Peanut Nazi

We continue to cater to the ignorant.

The proof is in Pasadena, CA where Julia Jennings, the Principal of Arroyo Vista Elementary School, has officially banned peanuts and peanut products because 20 of the school's 550 students suffer from peanut allergies. Should they eat, come into contact with, or even look at a peanut for too long, they will die.

This allergy is by no means the fault of the students affected. They can't control what they are allergic to. However, as the article (link deleted 'cause it's dead) points out, the remainder of students may suffer from allergies caused by things such as strawberries, dairy products or wheat, yet nothing seems to be done to protect them. Hell, I'm lactose intolerant myself but I drank my milk like a good little soldier all throughout my grade school years.

Now here's some stats for you:

Americans suffering from peanut allergies: 1.5 million.
Americans suffering from lactose intolerance: 30 to 50 million.

While lactose intolerance won't kill you, it can still cause a reaction in people that is, well, not the best thing a human being can experience. And the best way to avoid a reaction? Don't consume milk. Not hard. Don't come into contact with peanuts. Not too hard, either.

Yet we continue to serve milk in schools.

This, my friends, is called "selective enforcement". Let's protect those 20 students whose parents aren't bright enough to educate their children on the dangers of consuming peanuts or peanut products, or to avoid said products at all costs. It's much easier to inconvenience the other 530 students and parents who now have to pack different sandwiches into their kid's Britney Spears lunchboxes.

But there's even more good news for LI students at Arroyo Vista Elementary! Check out the school's menu, albeit from May 2004:

(Image lost because PhotoIsland sucks ass.)

Just about all of the entrees include a dairy product, whether it be cheese or yogurt. Nice going, guys. I hope a good portion of your school budget is slated for purchasing cases of toilet paper because with that menu, you're going to need it.

And I don't know about you, but when I was in school nobody I knew of had an allergy to peanuts, nor did we ever see anybody having a reaction to them. Maybe it was because back then, our parents knew better than to serve us a heaping spoonful of death between two slices of bread with the crusts cut off.

But I guess times were different back then. We never wore helmets while skateboarding or biking (now required). We drank sodas with saccharin (now defunct). We got our asses whipped when we did something wrong (an action that could get you thrown in jail these days). But you know what? We turned out alright.

Let's not ban such things as scissors which, in the hands of anybody at any point in the history of mankind, can be a lethal weapon. Sharpened pencils? Nah. Kids never poke themselves with those or accidentally inject themselves with pencil lead.

Why not ban oatmeal cookies? I remember hearing a story of a food fight years ago where a kid took an oatmeal cookie to the eye and it caused him to go blind. Whether it's true or not is not the case. The point is that anything has the potential to cause bodily harm, or even death.

No, let's fight the real enemy - peanuts.

And it seems that Principal Jennings would rather protect the 20 little crusaders who will never know the joys of biting into a Goober Grape sandwich, while her school's diarrhea-enducing menu will continue to dehydrate those students whose digestive systems can't handle the diary content of the menu.

I think I hear a toilet flushing.

Wednesday, September 15, 2004


1. Los Angeles, CA newscaster Kent Shocknek at CBS2 has mentioned me yet again in his blog for a link I sent to my brother. Note that despite what he says, I don't have that much free time on my hands...!

2. Oh, and Photodump is gone but has been replaced by I have replaced the links but am not sure of how stable this new image host is, so don't be surprised if they don't show up.

3. Template changes with a few personal modifications.

4. Fleas have attacked my house. At last count I had over 100 bites on my ankles and feet. They are slowly making their way up, now biting my arms and back.

5. My buddy Tal Johnson's Yahoo! profile (see post on 9/8/04) has been disabled for whatever reason.

More ramblings later...

Friday, September 10, 2004

Another One Bites the Dust...

If you were wondering where all of my pictures went, all I can tell you is this: Hell if I know.

The image host I was using,, has apparently changed hands as of this post. Therefore, any images hosted by them have now been deleted and I have no access to them. Also as of this post, the current website makes no mention of this so I don't know what's going on. Notice was never given, either.

That's what free gets ya I suppose.

The images will return once I find a new image host.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Help Tal Johnson Fight Spam!

Here is an unedited missive I got from a Tal Johnson, who can be contacted at

This email was, ironically, filtered by my Yahoo mail as spam, which I routinely check for newsletters that I actually subscribed to. Our buddy Tal signed up for Yahoo today, so I suppose he's really committed to this anti-spam fight.

At any rate, here's his message. I'd point out the grammatical errors but can figure them out:


My name is Tal Johnson. I have been against useless spam email for quite sometime now. Recently my yahoo account has been filled with numerous loads of spam. In fact that is how I got your email addresses, through the Carbon Copy (CC) header that was sent to you of spam sent to me.

I am writing a petion to send to yahoo to invest more man power into stopping this sick mail that I and you have been getting. Aol and Hotmail have brought legal suites against spammers. Lets work to get yahoo to do the same.

Im asking you to support my cause if you are like me and are sick and tired of getting junk email in our boxes!

Please reply to me if you are interested in signing my petion to yahoo to stop spam. Right now, I don't have much people, but hoping that you will help my cause, if I get enough people I will start writing out a petion that I will either send you in the mail to sign, or online. Just reply and I will keep you in the loop and send more information.

Let stop spam. You can forward this to any other yahoo friends that you know that may be interested in supporting my cause.

Thanks for your help in advance,
Tal Johnson


So I called his bluff. Here's my reply:

Dear Tal,

As much as I'd like to applaud your valiant efforts in attempting to stop Yahoo from sending "useless spam", I'd like to point out a few things to you:

1. Suggesting that I send this email to other "Yahoo friends" constitutes spam, therefore you are not helping the cause by suggesting such an action.

2.The term "useless spam" is redundant. All spam is useless.

3. You repeatedly use the term "petion" in your manifesto. If you plan on creating a *petition* to help stop "useless spam", you might want to hire a writer to help you out.

4. Yahoo has already taken great strides in improving their email filtering system. Spam will always get through unless you choose to only accept mail from those on your address book - the only surefire way to avoid spam.

5. Can't you just delete the spam? It's a lot quicker than complaining to the world about it and rest assured, nobody is listening.

There is no immediate cure for spam, therefore I would suggest dealing with it until there is. If you let *any* email account sit long enough it will get spammed.

If you plan on proceeding with your "petion", by all means do so. But note that you are fighting something that cannot be defeated.

David Moreno


Tal's reply will be posted, should I ever get one.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Because I Had To...

Here's my first post for August.

That is all for now.

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Help Me!

Alright, I've been thinking about something lately and I need to let it out. I'm dead serious.

Remember the video for Boyz II Men's "Motownphilly"? There were a number of guest appearances by other members of the so-called East Coast Family: Another Bad Creation, Bel Biv Devoe, and Sudden Impact.

But what or who the hell was Sudden Impact? I just remember them kind of posing then all pointing at the camera.

Here's a description: they are a bunch of dorky white guys. That's all I have.

While the Internet has turned out to be a fountain of useless facts, the history of this Sudden Impact group remains a mystery. I have no leads even after using my good friend Google.

Can you help? Any follow-ups will be posted here.

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

The Grimace Letter

Back in 2002, I sent McDonald's an email regarding an issue that had been troubling me for years. My inquiry was as follows:

When I was a child I remember Grimace being called the Evil Grimace,
and he used to steal milkshakes from unsuspecting children. At that time he had six arms.

Later on in life, and without any reasonable explanation, his arms were reduced to four and he was no longer "evil".

Today, he has two arms. What gives?

David A. Moreno

It took a few months, but I did get a reply:

Hello David:

Thank you for writing to McDonald's about Grimace.

Over the years the image of Grimace has changed because we want this character to represent McDonald's in a positive manner. Grimace personifies the child in everyone. He's a big, fuzzy, purple fellow, and is Ronald's right-hand man and closest friend.

Everyone in McDonaldland loves Grimace because of his innocent, loving nature. He's enthusiastic, eager and easily pleased. Grimace walks with a rolling gait, and can't be classified as any particular kind of animal.

Once again, David, thanks for thinking of Grimace. We look forward to serving you for many years to come.

McDonald's Customer Satisfaction Department

Maybe it's just me, but that didn't really answer my question.

And I soon realized the errors of my ways: Grimace never had six arms. Maybe it was just imbedded in my mind because of an old commercial in which Mayor McCheese raised his hand and yelled, "I second that motion!" Grimace then raised his hands one at a time and replied, "and third it, and fourth it, and fifth it, and and and sixth it!"

Ah, Grimace...

Monday, July 26, 2004

I'm Famous?

My brother is an engineer at KNX 1070 in Los Angeles. He mentioned my blog to a co-worker, newscaster Kent Shocknek, who has his own blog on the CBS2 website.

Wouldn't you know it - from there, he posts a link to mine which can be seen here.

I'm eating Chinese for lunch to celebrate my new-found fame.

I opted for JalepeƱo Poppers and a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger from Jack In The Box for lunch. Just wasn't feeling too Chinese today.

Thursday, July 22, 2004

It Happened Again...

When's the last time you heard Julian Lennon's Valotte? Has it been a while?

My last time: today. That makes it three times in the last month.

It's not that I have horrible taste in music, no. Anyone who knows me will argue with you on that. While some of my collection may be questionable, that dreadful song remains absent from it.

I heard it today while shopping at Stater Bros. market, which I guess doesn't really surprise me when I think about it. C'mon, Stater Bros. was the last market on Earth that carried Big John's Beans n' Fixin's for God's sake! They no longer do, so I bought 6 cans of the stuff when it went clearance and still have 3 left. It's good stuff.

Each trip to the store I seem to get taunted by that damned Valotte song, and today was no exception. I was actually hopping mad when the song came on - literally. With each jump, I blurted out a word that formed the sentence: "'"

Okay, I admit that the song may have been cool back in the day. But then again, so were sleeveless concert shirts.

It drives me nuts.

Saturday, July 17, 2004

You Can Stick It

Ann and I went to the Orange County Fair on Friday night. It's become a tradition with us in our over 11 years of marriage to take in the sights, sounds, smells and tastes of everything the fair has to offer.

But mostly, we go to eat. With such a variety of tasty foods everywhere you look, why would you go to do anything else?

One of our favorite places to eat is a Chinese food vendor called Pon's, home of the "Egg Roll on a Stick."

Egg roll on a stick? Can they do that?

Bah, I don't care. The food's good, even though the stick doesn't really give any additional suport to the egg roll.

But how do you explain, or eat, this?

As we walked around the place, I began to notice even more places taking advantage of the stick gimmick:

This looked pretty good, but we had already eaten:

I can't really say anything about Hot Dog on a Stick since they practically invented the whole stick idea:

Including Cheese on a Stick:

But perhaps the most disturbing, and nonsensical of all the stick foods, was the Cream Puff on a Stick:

Okay, I understand marketing and a gimmick is a gimmick. But seriously - what the hell are these people thinking?

Stick foods aside, the atmosphere is great - especially at night. The flashing lights from the rides, the sounds of people screaming, the carnies, it's fantastic. It's easy to see why Rod Serling used a carnival-type setting for an episode of The Twilight Zone. It's freakishly cool.

Another fun part of the fair is viewing the photo exhibition. I've been taking pictures since I was in high school and have taken lots of classes. I know about composition, subject matter, techniques, etc. I've also worked at many photo labs over the years. The same goes for Ann except that she learned everything from me, including working in photo labs.

Suffice it to say, we know a little. That's why it's fun to criticize the photos that the average eye will deem as "acceptable". The flaws can be easily pointed out and we do just that, even while someone is admiring.

"Ooh, honey, look at this one," someone might say.

"Pfft. It's out of focus, poorly composed, and just boring," is what we might say in return. Ah, the fun of it all.

Note: photographic prowess is not displayed on these images as they have been resized and are nothing more than simple shots of signs. I took them with my trust Sony DSC-P32 3.1 megapixel digital camera.

I did take some artsy-fartsy stuff, though:

Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at

Another part of the fair we like is the "Carnival of Products", or "Cavalcade of Crap" as we like to call it. Peddlers trying to sell you everything from hair extensions to "Powered by Deez Nuts" die-cut decals for your car (which I bought as a joke, I might add). We didn't buy anything in there, and the Deez Nuts sticker was purchased outside the crapfest.

We're going back in a few weeks to make up for what we missed last night. More fun--and food--to be had...

Speaking of food, I'm off to get a donut.

Friday, July 16, 2004

Fire, fire everywhere

I’m a native Californian. As such, I have grown accustomed to some things that tend to happen on a regular basis. Perhaps the most notable of these things, besides earthquakes (and even those seem to be random), are the wildfires that start to pop up around the summertime.
Like clockwork, one flares up and begins to spread. Then another one miles away starts and begins to work its way towards homes, ranches, and whatever else those silly humans have built up there.
How do I know this? It’s because every friggin’ news station in Southern California area takes it upon themselves to broadcast live images from the locations of these fires, putting their reporters in eminent danger. Just last year, Chuck Henry of NBC4 was literally crying like a little biatch when his news van was surrounded by wildfires. The camera was rolling as he was literally crying his eyes out thinking they were going to die. He and his cameraman were eventually rescued by firefighters but the whole situation just leaves me to wonder: why bother covering this? Here are some points to consider:
They Happen Every Year: Unlike an earthquake that can strike a moment's notice, wildfires happen every year. They are nothing new. Homeowners who live up in the mountains are warned every year well before fire season to trim back the brush so that the fires have a lesser chance of spreading. Whether they do or not, I don’t know, but something has to keep those damn fires burning.
Nothing to See Here…Move Along: Hours of live coverage from the air in helicopters that can either crash or get in the way of water tankers or firefighting helicopters. News reporters standing on hillsides pointing to some arbitrary location in the distance, their index finger commanding where the cameraman should be shooting. And for what? So the viewer at home can watch a fire burn…and burn…and burn. Wow. For my money, it doesn’t get any better than that! Seriously, there is no need for extensive coverage of these fires. They will burn – that’s what fires do. The people who live there have been evacuated; they aren’t watching the news. Would they want to? I mean, would you want to, knowing that there’s a chance your home will be reduced to a pile of ashes? Give me a high-speed chase anytime. At least there are more variables involved, increasing the chances of something different happening.
Not My Fault Those People Live Up There, or Build Your Next Home with Bricks, Morons: Of course, when the dust has settled, the cameras are back in position to get reaction from the homeowners. Reporters will ask the obvious questions: “How do you feel? Are you going to rebuild? Did you have homeowner’s insurance?” Okay, Army Archard, enough of the jibber-jabber.
We know how they feel – like crap.
Will they rebuild? My best advice is to build their next house out of bricks since chimneys are the only things that seem to survive the ravages of the flames. And honestly, if they do rebuild or stay in the mountains, they are idiots. It’s gonna happen again.
Oh yeah, and what homeowner in the mountains wouldn’t have homeowner’s insurance, especially fire insurance? Better do your homework next time.
What’s the Cause: When it all boils down, investigators seem to always come to the same conclusion – it was arson. Well, thanks for that. One day I hope that it’s caused by something more unlikely, like a clown crashing his car over the cliff and it exploding. Funny red noses and clown shoes everywhere.
Kudos to the Firefighers: While I may sound like as ass about this, my hat is off to those courageous men and women who risk their lives in taming these fires. I’ve always said that firefighting is one of the most underpaid occupations out there because you go to each call not knowing if you’ll ever see your family again. That takes more balls than any athlete who has ever played any game will ever have.

But as for the news coverage…sheesh. Tell me something worthwhile.